OFFICIAL BLOG

Fieldnotes

Izzy, Childless Stepmoms Chat, No One's the Bitch

Published by Wednesday Martin

My stepdaughter would deem the title of this post totally random. And it sort of is. But there is a deeper logic, sort of: these are the ladies and places I want to call to your attention — and thank.


Artist Karen Piovaty deconstructs wickedness — and a whole lot more

Published by Wednesday Martin

When I first discovered the work of Karen Piovaty nine years ago, I was thrilled — and a little scandalized. It was as if someone had finally had the nerve to express all the frightening, taboo thoughts I couldn't even admit to myself. Karen's take on stepmothering is provocative, but never merely so; it is also thoughtful social commentary and a sophisticated riff on families, stepparenting, and stereotypes. Karen's "marriage" of visuals and text unsettles, amuses, and reveals.


A few of our least favorite things

Published by Wednesday Martin

I'm so appreciative of the recent media interest in Stepmonster, and all the opportunities I have had to bring stepmother reality into a more public forum thanks to the TV and radio producers who have had me on their shows. These people usually have open minds and plenty of smart questions, and are helping get out the message that understanding stepmother reality is the crucial — and so far missing — link in helping stepfamilies survive.


Stepmonster on Second Wives Club

Published by Wednesday Martin

Second Wives Club is a website with great information for women with stepkids, including essays and articles on everything from parental alienation to financial planning in stepfamilies to navigating family court and understanding stepfamily architecture.


Susan Swanson of The Stepfamily Center interviewed about stepfamily life

Published by Wednesday Martin

I just listened to Susan Davis Swanson's interview with parenting author Joe Bruzzese about stepfamily life. Susan, director of The Stepfamily Center in Beverly Hills, had lots of smart observations and helpful suggestions. Among them: stepmothers, feel free to step out for some fresh air, time with friends, and personal rejuvenation when his kids are around; and remember, conflict and struggle are inevitable facts of stepfamily life, not signs that you, your marriage, or your stepfamily are a failure.


Stepmonster featured on Jacque Fletcher's Website...and a podcast coming soon!

Published by Wednesday Martin

You might know about Jacque Fletcher's terrific book, A Career Girl's Guide to Becoming a Stepmom, and her smart and popular blog, becomingastepmom. Jacque has been featuring Stepmonster of late — I'm so excited to have her support here, and grateful that she's helping spread the message about the emotional reality of women with stepchildren. Check out her reviews and mentions of Stepmonster, and access to a podcast she and I recently recorded at:


Mother's Day thoughts from Susan Davis-Swanson of the Stepfamily Center in L.A.

Published by Wednesday Martin

I recently spoke with Susan Davis-Swanson of The Stepfamily Center in Beverly Hills. Susan is a therapist and stepmother herself, and she has a truly expert, compassionate sense of what women with stepchildren and stepfamilies go through. On Mother's Day, I found her thoughts about the (impossible?) task of building a family culture where no one is an outsider especially insightful and reassuring. Susan is here addressing her remarks to those of us who are stepmothers and then have a baby of our own. The birth of a baby is an exciting, exhausting time for the mother — and a stepfamily flashpoint.