Twelve Days of Pleasure...Days Ten and Nine

Published by Wednesday Martin

Twelve Days of Pleasure/ Days Ten and Nine: Meet Two Women Who Will Change Your Life and Get You In Touch with Your Pleasure Powers

Featuring Tiffany Dufu and Latham Thomas

So, I owe you two today, because all weekend I slept late and didn't work. That's really unusual for me...if you're a writer, there are sort of no brakes, if you will, and no hard stops. You can write and research and edit and plot your next thing all the time. But as I age I'm getting better at letting the weekends be weekends.  So I dropped the ball on posting until the work week began.

Last time, I ask you to make a list of 5 - 10 things that bring you pleasure. What's on your list? Mine were...sleeping in and NOT working and seeing friends. Today I want to introduce you to two of my most incredible friends. They will change your life... I mean that. They taught me everything I know about prioritizing feeling good--and not feeling bad about it.

TIFFANY DUFU is an advocate for women and girls. She is former director of the White House Project and former director of Leadership at Levo. And her newest venture is THE CRU, a resource that helps women connect...and thrive. She is also the author of a book I love, DROP THE BALL (CLICK HERE). Tiffany is a highly efficient whirlwind or Getting It Done and Making It Happen. And yet she is also one of the funnest, funniest people you could ever get girlfriendy with at a cocktail party (we met for the first time at a bar in San Francisco and talked about sex for over two hours). You can't find your PLEASURE POWERS if you are too busy to even care about them and that's where Tiffany's book comes in. Buy it now. Read it. And start dropping the ball on stuff that doesn't matter, stuff that stresses you but that you could let go. Trust me, it will improve your days and your mind. Could you buy cookies rather than bake them for the holiday thing? Could you send someone else out to buy them? Tiffany taught me about Task Rabbit CLICK HERE, people you can hire by the hour to help you out with everything from waiting on line to buying and wrapping holiday presents so you can...bake gingerbread or have a nap or meditate or get to know your vibrator better. Doing less means more time for the pursuit of pleasure.

Another goddess who has changed my life and will change yours and get you in touch with your pleasure powers is LATHAM THOMAS CLICK HERE. This is the person who taught me about the vast playground which is the internal clitoris! (More on that in the days to come). Latham is a doula, pleasure educator, and one of Oprah's Super Soul 100. She taught me the value of an evening bath ritual. As in, a bath with stuff in it that makes you feel really good. A scrub, some epsom salts, and a sexy balm to put on yourself after. She taught me dozens of other things as well and it's all in her book OWN YOUR GLOW CLICK HERE a book about luminous living. The book is full of information, suggestions, and exercises to help you improve how you  experience everything from parenting to meditation to orgasm. Latham IS luminous and alive. She is the guide you want to take you through pregnancy, motherhood, and beyond...but much of what she writes about goes far beyond, to address your soul. She wants you to ask yourself what nourishes you, makes you feel alive, gives you pleasure. Sign up for one of her workshops and be absolutely amazed. 

Latham and Tiffany both believe deeply in service. Latham is steering a group of Renegage Doulas to respond to the black maternal health crisis in our country. Tiffany is on the boards of Girls Who Code and Simmons College and active with Girls Scouts of America. You can't serve others if you don't take care of yourself, and these two know it.