Women who have an issue with #metoo — notice that among other things it’s a generational and political (progressive/conservative) divide. And much of it, when you read closely, is a version of “WE put up with it & we are ok so stop being crybabies/victims.“
#metoo is paving the way for gender equality in ecologies like Hollywood, finance, science, and politics. I look forward to the day when female sexuality re-enters the equation. And women are not attacked for saying, "It's not just wrong to harass me because I don't want it and because you have power and I don't. Harassment is wrong because you are not recognizing that I am sexual in my own right, rather than just some extension of your desires." We need a world where we acknowledge that women, not just men, have a fundamental right to be sexual. Without being stigmatized or punished for it.
Instead of being respected for her brilliant career, when Nancy Friday died this November, her obituaries reminded me of the perils of being female and ‘too much.’
It's hard to remember an issue that has galvanized women like our recent national conversation about sexual harassment and sexual assault. Women are angry, fed up, and speaking up. Harvey Weinstein's harassment of women, his bartering for sexual favors with his influence as an image-maker who could make or break actresses' careers, went largely unchecked for years. And unsurprisingly, he had a whole army of enablers--everyone from the agents and managers who knew and kept sending actresses his way to the lawyers who made settlements, effectively silencing women and allowing Weinstein to continue harassing them. I have heard from dozens of women who tell me memories they had long buried are rising to the surface--memories of being propositioned at work, harassed, assaulted in any number of fields.
Anthropologists and primatologists tell us that environment and ecology are variables that really matter when it comes to how we lead our lives, including our sex lives. We evolved as flexible social and sexual strategists. In some contexts, for example, humans are polyandrous while in others, they're polygynous. Here's a piece on how one group of women "play" in one particular ecological niche, the Hamptons, in the summer...
It's OK to wear nipple tape in L.A., writes best-selling author and cultural critic Wednesday Martin as she checks out the all-female gratification gathering and notices distinct differences across the coasts.
What can an all-women's sex party teach us about our deepest selves?
American Women: Colluders-in-Chief Melania and Ivanka are not your friends.
When it comes to gender, we live in strange times.